THE CARTOON CHARACTER IN YOU

Everyone has a personality of a cartoon character.
Have you ever asked yourself what cartoon character you most resemble?
A group of investigators got together and analyzed the personalities of well-known and modern cartoon characters.
The information that was gathered was made into this test.
Answer all the questions with what describes you best, then add up all your points at the end and look for your results.
Then forward this to all your friends and change the subject of this message to what character you are.

1) Which one of the following describes a perfect date?

a) Candlelight dinner
b) Fun/Theme Park
c) Painting in the park
d) Rock concert
e) Going to the movies

ANS: (c) Painting in the park

2) What is your favorite type of music?

a) Rock and Roll
b) Alternative
c) Soft Rock
d) Country
e) Pop

ANS: (c) Soft rock

3) What type of movies do you prefer?

a) Comedy
b) Horror
c) Musical
d) Romance
e) Documentary

ANS: (c) Music

4) Which one of these occupations would you choose, if you only could choose one?

a) Waiter
b) Professional Sports Player
c) Teacher
d) Police
e) Cashier

ANS: (c) Teacher

5) What do you do with your spare time?

a) Exercise
b) Read
c) Watch television
d) Listen to music
e) Sleep

ANS: (d) Listen to music

6) Which one of the following colors do you like best?

a) Yellow
b) White
c) Sky Blue
d) Dark Blue
e) Red

ANS: (d) Dark blue

7) What do you prefer to eat right now?

a) Snow
b) Pizza
c) Sushi
d) Pasta
e) Salad

ANS: (d) Pasta

8) What is your favorite Holiday?

a) Halloween
b) Christmas
c) New Year
d) Valentines Day
e) Thanksgiving

ANS: (b) Christmas

9) If you could go to one of these places which one would it be?
a) Paris
b) Spain
c) Las Vegas
d) Hawaii
e) Hollywood

ANS: (a) Paris

10) With which of the following would you prefer to spend time with?
a) Someone Smart
b) Someone attractive
c) Someone who likes to Party
d) Someone who always has fun
e) Someone very sentimental

ANS: (a) Someone smart

Now add up your points and find out the answer you have been waiting for!

1.) a-4 b-2 c-5 d-1 e-3
2.) a-2 b-1 c-4 d-5 e-3
3.) a-2 b-1 c-3 d-4 e-5
4.) a-4 b-5 c-3 d-2 e-1
5.) a-5 b-4 c-2 d-1 e-3
6.) a-1 b-5 c-3 d-2 e-4
7.) a-3 b-2 c-1 d-4 e-5
8.) a-1 b-3 c-2 d-4 e-5
9.) a-4 b-5 c-1 d-4 e-3
10.) a-5 b-2 c-1 d-3 e-4

MY TOTAL POINTS: 34

(10-16 points) You are Garfield: You are very comfortable, and easy going and you definitely know how to have fun but sometimes you take it to an extreme. You always know what you are doing and you are always in control of your life. Others may not see things as you do, but that doesn't mean you always have to do what is right. Try to remember your happy spirit may hurt you or others.

(17-21 points) You are Snoopy: You are have fun and you are very cool and popular. You always know what's in and you never are out of style.You are good at knowing how to satisfy everyone else.You have probably disappeared for a few days more than once but you always come home. Being married and having children are important to you but only after you have had your share of fun times.

(22-28 points) You are Arnold: You have lots of friends and you are also popular always willing to give advice and help out a person in need. You are very optimistic and you always see the bright side of things. Some good advice: try not to be too much of a dreamer, if you are you will have many conflicts with life.

(29-34 points) You are Sponge Bob Square Pants: You are the classic person that everyone loves. You are the best friend anyone could ever want to have and never want to loose. You never cause harm to anyone and they would never not understand your feelings. Life is a journey it's funny and calm for the most part. Stay away from traitors and jealous people & then you will be stress free.

(35-42 points) You are Charlie Brown: you are tender, you fall in love quickly but you are also very serious about all relationships. You are a family person. You call your Mom every Sunday. You have many friends and may occasionally forget a few birthdays. Don't let your passion confuse you with reality.

(43-50 points) You are Dexter: You are smart and definitely a thinker. Every situation is fronted with a plan. You have a brilliant mind. You demonstrate very strong family principles. Maintain a stable routine but never ignore a bad situation when it comes.

MY CARTOON CHARACTER: Sponge Bob Square Pants

Now change the subject of the email to what you are and send it on!

From Yushan's Blog:

A or B

1. Stop or go?
Go

2. Dog or cat?
No preference

3. Coke or Pepsi
No preference . . . prefer non-gaseous drinks

4. White or black?
Black

5. Winter or summer?
Winter

6. Yahoo or MSN?
MSN

7. Married or live-in?
Married

8. Radio or television?
Radio

9. Sing or dance?
Sing

10. Compuer or cellular phone?
Computer . . . I think it has more uses than the phone

11. Pen or pencil?
Pen for writing essays and stories and scripts; pencil for music manuscripts

12. Dollar or peso?
Dollar of course!

13. Shower or bath?
Shower . . . it takes ages to fill up the tub for a bath

14. DVD player or VCD player?
DVD

15. Bed or couch?
Bed

16. McDonald's or Jollibee?
Still like Burger King best . . .

17. Vodka or beer?
Neither . . . I am unable to hold my drink . . .

18. Rock or rap?
Rock . . . can't stand non-melodic pieces

19. Driver or passenger?
Passenger . . . can sleep in the vehicle

20. Chinese or Japanese?
Chinese . . . I've learnt the language already and I'm in no mood to learn another Asian language . . .

21. Mum or Dad?
Mum

22. 666 or 333
333 . . . sounds more auspicious . . . 666 sounds like "sick, sick, sick"

23. Face or body?
Face . . . that's where you maintain eye contact with when you talk

24. Kobe Bryant or Michael Jordan?
No preference . . . never watched basketball

25. South or north?
North . . . because they're always Communist

26. First or last?
Depends on the situation

27. Gold or silver?
Gold . . . because it means (1) one day off; (2) $200 in the bank, (3) no more IPPT until next year!!! (*breaks into song: "No more SOC! / No more IPPT! / No more Sergeant tekan me / All the doo-dah-dey yah!")

28. Cockroach or worms?
Worms

29. Do's or don'ts?
Do's

30. Kiss with or without the tongue?
Without

31. Sleep or eat?
Sleep

32. Britney or Christina?
Neither!

33. Ashless or Jessica Simpson?
Who are they?

34. Mariah or Regina?
Who's the Regina person?

35. Nice or sweet?
Sweet . . . nice is too generic and sounds too distant

36. Young or old?
Old: (1) you have people to take care of you, (2) you are respected and revered for having seen the world for such a long time, (3) if you live in Sweden the government gives you money, not like here where everything is CPF, CPF and more CPF

37. Comedy or drama?
Comedy

38. Action or horror?
Action . . . hate horrors . . . they scare me, including their trailers in the cinemas

39. Friends or family?
Friends . . . sometimes more things to talk about

40. Nemo or Stitch?
No preference . . . I haven't watched either movies

41. Spongebob or Patrick Star?
Patrick Star . . . because we once used it as a cheer in BMT and it was pretty fun

42. Freddy or Jason?
Freddy . . . more closer to human

43. Regular or summer school?
What?

44. Hot or cold?
Lukewarm

45. Choice or chance?
Chance . . . because you are forced to take it with the knowledge that it may never come back again. I hate making decisions, so choice is out for me.

46. Bamboo or rivermaya?
What is rivermaya? Anyway I still prefer bamboo

47. Manual or automatic?
Automatic

48. The Grinch or Jack (The Nightmare Before Christmas)
Jack

49. Black-and-white or coloured?
Black-and-white

50. Spoon or fork?
Spoon . . . almost ninety percent of the food I eat contains rice. Don't forget the soup.

51. Slow or fast?
Slow

52. Chores or grounded?
Grounded . . . because I can still use my laptop and play my piano . . . I'm sick of doing "chores" in army

53. The Simpsons or Futurama?
The Simpsons . . . I grew up watching Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa, Maggie and the people of Springfield

54. Pimples or blackheads?
Pimples

55. English or Tagalog
English

56. Vin Diesel or Paul Walker?
Who the hell is Paul Walker?

57. Friendster or My Space?
Friendster

58. Gum or candy?
Both

59. MTV or MYX?
What's MYX?

60. Tacos or burritos?
Burritos!

61. Giordano or Lee?
Giordano

62. Pay or free?
Free of course!

63. High school or college?
High school

64. Whale or shark?
Shark - the cutting edge creature

65. Fast food or fine dining?
Fast food . . . can't be bothered to dress to the nines and observe so much etiquette for fine dining . . .

66. Superman or Spiderman?
No preference

67. Mario or Luigi?
No preference . . . I don't even play the game

68. Werewolves or vampires?
Vampires . . . because I studied "Dracula"

69. Witches or bitches?
Witches . . . witches will kill you so you don't have to appreciate their ugly looks and cackling voice further; on the other hand, bitches will never kill you so you have to torture yourself by appreciating them, and somehow you wish you were dead. Yet euthanasia is illegal.

70. Buffy or Darkangel?
No preference . . . I never watched the shows before anyway.

71. Smart-ass or sarcastic?
Smart-ass . . . then you can be sarcastic to them.

72. Burn or freeze?
Burn! Set off explosives and burn 'em!

73. Class work or homework?
No preference, because most of the time class work will ultimately and eventually become homework when not able to be completed in the duration of the lesson.


74. Math or Science?
Math . . . the studying part is not so boring as you are constantly writing and trying to crack new problems that don't repeat themselves . . . okay, simultaneous equations might keep re-appearing, but then you are dealing with new numbers everyday.

75. Adam Sandler?
Adam Sandler

76. Famous or rich?
Rich

77. Day or night?
Night

78. True or false?
True. Who likes to be lied to?

79. Pizza or pasta?
Pasta

80. McDonald's or spaghetti?
Spaghetti

81. Cheesy or chilli?
Chilli . . . don't like cheese

82. Milk or coffee?
Coffee any day please! No milk in it as well.

83. Ham or bacon?
Ham . . . bacon more salty

84. Peanut butter or cheese?
Peanut butter . . . as mentioned I don't like cheese

85. Nokia or Samsung?
Nokia . . . I swear by me 3310!

86. Italy or France?
Italy

87. Star City or Enchanted Kingdom?
Enchanted Kingdom . . . Pipiland is a Kingdom too

88. Lesbian or gay?
No difference right? They're all the same sexes loving one another

99. Run or walk?
Walk

100. Beginning or end?
Beginning . . . never liked the good things to end

--- I ---

WITs are becoming some shit thing.

It's like trying to find fault with every single thing within the SAF. Everyone is forced to contribute a certain amount of ideas every year for WITs, whether you like it or not. Pride camps have to be organised for such a purpose, so that we can "think" in a more relaxed and conducive environment. I'll be attending one next week.

Our platoon did brain-writing on Tuesday. What is brain-writing, you may ask, if you haven't heard of it before? Basically it's the writing and simultaneous sharing of ideas in machine-gun rapidity. Each person grabs hold of a sheet of paper and scribbles an idea onto it. Then the paper is passed to others to allow them to read. The second person will make comments or add new ideas (or both) on his friend(s)' sheet of paper. He will pass the paper to the third person and so on.

Eventually only three of the ideas are accepted. The rest are shot down.

Next week we have to rack our brains to think of five. We already have three. This means another day of brain-writing, then shooting down to whittle the list to two. To play safe, we ought to have six altogether, in case some other team's idea(s) get rejected, and we can come to the rescue with our extra idea.

Brain-writing creates hilarity. You just have to hand it to those people. We even have things like: "Toilet flush not working; replace all toilet flushes with the press-button one". Or, installing wheels on the tool bag because it is "too heavy".

Anyway, nothing is as absurd as the ideas generated during a brain-writing session as part of the WITs introductory lecture on Tuesday. The topic given: "How to increase the birth rate of Singapore." Almost eighty per cent of the ideas generated were based on sex, because - perhaps - to them it is like the "which came first - the chicken or the egg" question. Obviously sex comes first; without sex one wouldn't have babies, they think.

So we have some of the strangest responses you can ever imagine: nights-off to Geylang; make it compulsory to have sex everyday; sex parade; encourage the watching of porn . . . to the extent of one involving the aunties at the cookhouse. Cedric, Alvin and I deplore the sorry state which the activity turned out. I wonder if Sir had thought about this before he shot off the topic to everybody.

--- II ---

My respect and liking for the OC has dropped to the all-time low, similar to the affections that I show for Mr George W Bush of America.

Doraemon is one of the worst leaders, or bosses, you can ever find. He does not lead by example. He does not have a heart. He pushes the blame and the work to other people. He doesn't know how to motivate people.

Some of the bastard things he has done:

He states a company rule that no one is allowed to sleep in bunk during office hours, or else they will be "disciplinarily dealt with". Now, note the loophole in the statement. It says, "No sleeping in BUNK", which means that one can sleep on the corridor outside the bunk. Another point to note: he has been caught by many company personnel - sergeants and privates alike - at different times and at different locations sleeping the afternoon away, when his standing orders state "no sleeping".

He changes cars during office hours. I can still recall: in the morning, he is still driving his old car. In the afternoon, the car disappears. In the evening, during the last parade, we see a brand new car sitting in OC's lot.

He demands that PC 2 return to the unit to be the Company Duty Officer, even when the latter is suffering from a fever of 40 degrees Celsius.

During the recent Section Battle Course, where the Saturday live-firing was badly screwed, Doraemon blamed PC 2, who was the conducting officer. Doraemon himself didn't take any blame, even though he was the supervising officer, one step higher than the conducting.

He forces Sergeant Sheng Ming to finish reading the standing order for the guard complex - all seven chapters - by Thursday. When Sergeant Sheng Ming asks for an extension, the OC grins sadistically and says that he wants to test us on Friday. But I doubt he even bothers to read the entire document, which spans seven long chapters. Furthermore, it isn't fair if he takes out a page of the document and tests us from there. Who in the right state of mind is going to memorise the entire document word for word, punctuation for punctuation? Not unless you call in the Muggers. Even during the reading, the OC and his suck-cock buddy, the CSM, were very rude. They admired each other's car engines - as usual - but made a hell lot of noise that distracted us listening to Sergeant Sheng Ming read the document.

He returns to company line late on one of the Fridays, delaying our company-level stand-by bed and eventually delaying our book-out time. Some people nearly dialled the Safety Hotline.

He falls out during a 5km run, having completed only 2km. At least he could have the decency to walk the remaining 3km and complete the distance provided.

We wonder if he really cares for us. After the AHM, we hear that there will be off-in-lieu given for the Sunday burnt, and for those who ran 21km under 2 hours and 45 minutes. If he truly cared, he would have fought for our rights.

He is tactless, and lousy at motivating people (refer to my post on 7 August). While we have just lost a long National Day weekend thanks to our graduation exercise, he has to tell us, "Be prepared to burn more Sundays in the future for live-firing." Thanks, man. You really made our day.

No wonder, he is still a lieutenant. I feel a sense of shame when all the OCs are mentioned during the RSM's thank-you speech: captain, captain, captain, captain, and the last of them all, lieutenant. Fine, I'm discriminating against rank. But if he were good, we wouldn't mind him being a lieutenant. At least he's doing a good job, regardless of rank. But the sad fact is, he isn't.

Happy birthday Sandy and Alvin!

--- I ---

Listening to:
Sibelius Violin Concerto in D minor / Goldmark Violin Concerto in A minor
Joshua Bell / Violin
Esa-Pekka Salonen / Los Angeles Philharmonic

Today marks the search for the above-mentioned CD.

When I've set my sights on something, I will not hesitate to go all out for it. I have prepared myself to scour HMV, Towers, Borders and whatsoever music store for the CD, recommended by Proko, who has bought a copy for himself. Even if it means travelling from the Suntec area to the heart of Orchard Road, you'll find me travelling.

It is probably my love for Sibelius' music that sets me to do that. I only have the first movement of the Violin Concerto in my mp3 collection; it stuns me every time I listen to it. A particular favourite section is the second subject theme, which is so melting. As with Sibelius' other orchestral works, his instrumental writing gives a kind of cold and bare feeling; you tend to dream of the Nordic landscape where it's chilly and sparse. My last Sibelius disc was a recording of his Second and Fifth Symphonies, both my favourites, although lately I've preferred the Fifth compared to the Second. I fell in love with the Second while watching the SSO perform it last year, alongside the rather horribly played Brahms Piano Concerto No. 1. Okay, not exactly horribly played, because the rondo was the best, the fastest and the most exciting I ever heard.

Anyway, today is also a trip to the Library@Esplanade. I have borrowed two CDs: Oriental Landscapes as performed by Evelyn Glennie and the SSO, as well as James MacMillan's Cello Concerto and "The World's Ransoming". I think I'm still very much a tonal person; even while listening to modern 20th century, or even 21st century works, I'd prefer tonal pieces.

* * *

UBS Verbier Festival Orchestra is coming back! But their concert is on a weekday - can't go. Sad. They're playing Beethoven's Violin Concerto again! I love that work, particularly the second; would love to listen to another interpretation.

So many orchestras have played the Violin Concerto in Singapore: Yong Siew Toh Conservatory Orchestra; SSO (with Maxim Vengerov); Malaysian Philharmonic (with the Greek violinist - can't remember his name) and now UBS.

Anyway Sibelius' Violin Concerto is to be performed by the SSO on 3 December; wonder if I am free to go? I hope they won't change the programme or try to do anything funny . . .

--- II ---

So many things I never knew:

Christopher Reeve, star of the Superman movies, died at age 52.

The president of Indonesia has been changed . . . to whom I also don't know.

My eldest cousin is getting married this coming Friday.

This shows how I am lagging behind in life.

--- III ---

James Levine and Renee Fleming on Friendster!?

Yes, believe it.

And James has his nice little nick: Jimmy.

--- I ---

Yay! I got my first IPPT silver!

The scores:

Chin-ups: 11 (4 points)
Shuttle Run: 10.3 seconds (4 points)
Sit-ups: 42 (5 points)
Standing Broad Jump: 234cm (4 points)
2.4km Run: timing unsure, but in the silver category

I am shocked after I continue pulling my eighth, then ninth, then tenth, and finally eleventh chin-up. I attempt a twelve, but my arms tell me that they are unable to take it any further halfway through the pull.

For the Jump I stretch my hands all the way to the back, giving my body an extremely tight curve to garner all the momentum. I swing my hands back hard and leap forward. Doraemon, who is watching, comments that I have height but no distance. I don't dare to try distance and neglect height, or else I may suddenly crash-land on a <200cm mark.

Knowing the route of the 2.4km run, I mentally plan where I am going to run fast, and where I will slow down. The latter shall be done at uphill areas, which is more tiring to manage. I compensate back lost time on flat and downward-sloping ground.

I have been suffering from the effects of a cold the past week. I go under running water to blow out yellow or white sticky mucus several times a day. The last thing I realise is that the mucus turns watery during this run and less than hundred metres from the start point, it is threatening to spill out of my nose. Darn. Forgive me, this is disgusting, but I have no choice but to use my singlet to clean it, rather than let it dribble all over the place. I am probably one of the noisiest runners around, making snorting noises as I breathe in hard to pull the yucky substance back into the windpipe to delay its outpouring.

By the halfway point of the second round (the route is actually two rounds about the complex of 4 SAB) my windpipe seems to be jammed; I have to breathe through my mouth. I dislike inviting air from there, because the wind that blows through parches my throat, and makes running a discomfort. Most of the time I shut my mouth and breathe through my nose - which is less taxing.

So now I'm sprinting downhill towards the finishing, and I'm breathing through my mouth. Bloody murder. I feel like I'm one of those spastic patients making a feeble attempt to speak, but am unable to do so because something seems to clog up my oesophagus.

The chip distribution system is horrible. At the halfway point, in a flurry of anxiety, some of the "invigilators" drop their chips onto the ground. Or else it would be that a runner misses the chip while attempting to grab it, and it drops. Most of them never stop running; anyway the invigilators tell them to go on and forget about the chip.

At the end point, there is equal confusion. At the eleventh hour Sergeant Zhi Peng takes over the distribution of the number tags from Sergeant Errol. So late it is that he cannot extract the chips - which are kept together by a piece of comms cord - in time for the first runner to come in. When I cut through the finishing line, I wonder, where are the number chips? Then I hear Sergeant Zhi Peng calling me over to take a chip.

Today's test was nearly disqualified over the situation. Some people didn't get their number chips. Thankfully the neutral officer is "kaki lang" (own people), and he closed one eye.

I feel that we should have been divided into clusters to run, which we did in the previous trial test. There are close to fifty of us running in one shot, making crowd control difficult, particularly at the finishing point. When one or two people return, it is still okay, they can be marshalled through the finishing cones. Now, when one cluster-fuck of people return, the attendants at the end line are faced with the problem of crowd-management. Number tags can't be efficiently handed out either.

Then again, muses Colin Yeo from Platoon One (darn, I'm sounding like a reporter, but this is what he actually told me), why do they give us the number tag for? I don't see it being used throughout the test, not even during the 2.4km run. So why do we wear the stupid yellow thing? To make us look like professional athletes? Again, from Colin: they could have had someone write down the numbers on the tag as the runners run past the finishing line, as a confirmation to the submission of number chips thereafter.

--- II ---

It's difficult being the oddball wretch in the company, whose interests are almost totally different from the others.

Perhaps that is why I usually find it difficult to engage in long conversations with the others - I can't pull a topic out naturally. In fact, I hardly have anything to talk about. Other people engage in talk about hand-held games, computer games, Play Station 2, comics, soccer - oh, the list goes on and on. If I join in a conversation, it usually means that I "eavesdrop" - I am at the corner taking in whatever they say without the slightest notion of what is going on, and hardly open my mouth to add to anything because I don't have the topic at hand.

Perhaps that is why sometimes I prefer to set myself to work rather than stay around and mingle and relax with the others, because I'd get perfectly bored. What the Chancellor told me in the past is accurate: while working one tends to concentrate intently on his task and not think of other things, particularly unhappy thoughts.

Every Monday when I go back to camp, I often feel I'm going have to ditch my favourite music and hear nothing about it for one week, until Friday night, when I book out again. Even English oldies are not welcomed in the bunk; once I tuned the radio to 90.5FM; it invited howls of protest. The only one time I managed to listen to 92.4FM was when the whole company was given a nights-off, and the bunk was left with two of my close friends who didn't really bother what frequency I was tuned to. I don't really like the programming in 92.4FM - it plays too much Baroque and Classical Music, and hardly a lot from the Romantic and Modern 20th Century periods. Not very adventurous and varied. Still, it's a welcome from pop songs. 93.3FM is the most tuned-to station, followed by 98.7FM. The former plays songs that sound so similar to one another that you might think you were listening to an extended variation all day long. Also I chastise it for playing hit favourites repeatedly, like Joi Chua's "Sunrise" which is becoming a bloody murder weapon, being played once almost every day. I'm also pissed that "Persian Cat" by S.H.E. is not known to be derived from Albert Ketebely's (I wonder if my spelling is correct) "In a Persian Market", from the beggars' theme. The Chinese and Taiwanese have a penchant for picking every shit theme the west plays, giving them new lyrics, and then throwing them to the public to become hits. It's very dirty.

98.7FM, on the other hand, plays another shit load of English music - those kinds of crappy disco remixes, or dance songs that you'd expect to hear at clubs. Well I don’t go clubbing, anyway I hate being in some half-dark dingy place with cigarette smoke all around and loud music blaring from the loudspeakers overhead. Experience derives from being at Angel's Reborn, and I am certainly put off by that and I will never go to another nightclub, unless being forced to.

Perhaps this week I shall bring a Discman in, if I can get my copy of Joshua Bell playing Sibelius' Violin Concerto.

--- III---

Jobs opportunities for Armoured Pioneers after ORD:

Toilet cleaner (area-cleaning allocation: toilets)

Plumber (our CSM says he might teach us toilet cleaners how to fix toilets and sinks in the event we find something not working when we go to clean the toilet each day)

Road sweeper

Construction worker

Lumberjack (heard from the RSM that we're going to cut down some trees in our unit compound soon . . .)

Maria (you know . . . that type of Maria)

Car-cleaner (at the car parks of shopping centres, includes cleaning the interiors of vehicles)

Food-taster, Makansutra style (we've eaten enough SFI food to tell what is poor cooking and bad mixture of dishes - not to mention poor food quantity - hear that, it's also quantity, besides quality - management)

Logistics personnel, or to put it simply, store men (thanks to doing lots of stores around the company line)

Mover (house, goods etc)

Security guard (training from signing extras and performing regimental duties in camp)

Ushers (from performing marshalling duties)

PE teacher (we're fitness freaks in the army; we'll probably organise large-scale runs around the perimeter of the school every two days. We'll also conduct 5BX every morning after flag-raising)

Discipline master (we've been tekan-ed enough to know how to tekan others. "Knock it down" and "wake up to your idea" will be memories in school vocabulary)

Mechanic (five days of helping to service and maintain the tanks)

Forest ranger with National Parks Board (the love of the outfield being cultivated through participating in numerous exercises and missions in the Great Outdoors)

Booby-trapper

Electrician

Acrobat (from climbing all over the tank to arrange and secure the stores in place within ten minutes)

I've become the butt of a rather embarrassing incident . . .

Okay, so here it goes. In camp, I normally tuck in very early, to ensure that I get sufficient rest to feel refreshed for the long day ahead. Tonight, I'm in bed by 9:00pm, and I doze off perhaps within fifteen minutes or so. I cover my entire body, including the head, with the blanket, as the bunk is still fully lit. Lights-out is only at ten-thirty.

It takes a while before one has been fully transported to dreamland in deep sleep. I am in the stage of semi-consciousness. I hear many voices entering the bunk, and someone calling my name. Am I dreaming or what? I don't know whether to respond or not; I'm too tired to open my mouth and project some sound anyway.

Somebody pulls the blanket away from my head*. It is Sergeant Wen Hao. He plants the cell phone beside my ear. I wonder how I ever said "hello" into the microphone.

"Hello, August, what is your full name?"

"Lum Hoi Ying August," I recite, half-dazed.

"Again?"

"Lum Hoi Ying August," I repeat obediently.

Suddenly it dawns upon me that I know not of the identity of the caller. "Hello, who is this?"

(As I write this it all seems so stupid.)

"Sergeant Goh."

"Orh . . . Sergeant Goh . . . Lum Hoi Ying August," I drawled.

"How do you spell?"

"H-O-I space Y-I-N-G. August is the same spelling as the month August."

"A-U-G-U-S-T?"

"Yes . . ."

"Okay. Thanks."

End of conversation.

* * *

Next day, at lunch, I overhear Sergeant Wen Hao recounting the event to other people in the platoon. I walk over. He catches sight of me: "Aiyah, you should spell it [my name] out for him, you keep going 'Lum Hoi Ying, Lum Hoi Ying", how do people know how to spell?"

Anyway Sergeant Wen Hao has taken to calling me "Hoi Ying" since then.



*According to BH, Sergeant Wen Hao initially thought that I had deliberately ignored him, and that I was talking on my mobile phone under the blankets when he came into the bunk.

I am extremely distressed: the company is planning for another cohesion, which means it is something I am not going to like. I am sure it will be clubbing.

Apparently SSO has changed the programme at the last minute. The gala concert with Maxim Vengerov ought to have featured Britten's Four Seas Interludes and his Violin Concerto, as well as Ravel's Tzigane and the Suite No. 2 from Daphnis et Chloe. Instead, the programme has been changed to accommodate Beethoven's (fourth) Fidelio Overture, Violin Concerto and Bright Sheng's Nanking! Nanking!

Bearing the two classics in mind, I approach the concert hall with a slight tinge of apprehension that the SSO will screw them up, like how they screwed the Brahms (see the 28 November 2003 entry) and Beethoven's Fifth Symphony. Even the newspapers admit that the SSO seems to play much better the newly-commissioned works, the modern works and the rare greats. The usual works we've more or less heard of time and again - they play them terribly.

Shui Lan is conductor for tonight - hooray! I've always liked his conducting - lots of drive and passion. I love those pre-emptive strikes he makes - he always throws the cue at the instrument(s) or orchestra milliseconds before they are supposed to enter.

The Fidelio Overture is pretty well played, except for some discrepancies in the playing near the beginning, when the horns, thereafter the clarinets, fail to enter in unison. But they recover pretty quickly.

Next is Bright Sheng's work - hints of the book Rape of Nanking. On first thought it seems to be a pipa concerto, but after listening to the entire work, which lasts roughly half an hour, the pipa makes it entrance like three or four times. In fact, the quantity of passage given to the solo violin is sufficient to match that of the pipa.

The work opens so quietly that you probably don't realise it has started, unless you pay attention to the soft pounds on the temple blocks at intervals, and obviously, the swaying white conducting baton. The music stays like this for ages - until . . .

BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM!!!

I get a fright. The orchestra hits two-times fortissimo out of nowhere. The last time the orchestra ever shocked me was at an outdoor concert at the Woodlands Regional Centre, where the tam-tam player struck his instrument ever so loudly to mark the start of Aaron Copland's Fanfare for the Common Man. Even Mr Leong, whom I accompanied, jumped in his seat.

You might probably think you were listening to a film's soundtrack - or, to put it another way: a sonic movie. The screaming of the orchestra - especially the never-ending za-za-za-za-za of the rattle is enough to drive you crazy if this goes on for one hour. It's a garbage-full of noise all around.

The only contrast is the lush setting for strings somewhere in the middle of the piece. Just strings - those romantic kind of writing that you get in the old Hollywood movies, when lovers, all alone to themselves, smooch and touch each other all over: "Oh . . . Jake! I loooooooove you!"

*Pukes*

This playing of Beethoven's Violin Concerto is one of the better ones I've heard. Well done, Maxim, and well done, SSO! At least the latter doesn't screw it up. And the playing is more emotional, as compared to the stiffened and synthetic playing of the Brahms last year. Maxim composed his own cadenzas - I like that for the third movement - it lasts less than a minute, and then the orchestra returns. It doesn't interrupt the flow of the piece - rather, it carries the movement forward from the dominant chord that marks the beginning of the cadenza, to the coda.

Standing ovations and numerous curtain calls for Maxim - too many to remember. Maxim plays two encores - one is the ever-famous Meditation from Thais and the other, some piece with a narration telling a story. The first is played with much beauty of emotion - for once I don't feel it's clichéd, as I've always felt that piece has been, because of its association with those heart-wrenching moments, no matter on stage or on the screen. Once, a committee member from my House in JC asked me to look for a piece of music to represent an emotional scene in a drama. She had this particular piece in mind, but she didn't know the title. I asked her to sing it - in turn she sang the opening bars of Meditation. Immediately I knew what it was. I wasn't surprised at her choice. Neither was I surprised she knew the melody (but had no idea of the title). Since then I have never listened to the piece, because it's usage is too overwhelming. I've nothing against the composition; just that too many people use it for those moments when tissue paper is a must.

The second is cute and very funny. Maxim tells us he played this while visiting the underprivileged kids in Uganda and Thailand. He starts fiddling away - a very Spanish-sounding tune. Suddenly he stops, and comes to the microphone. He narrates the first lines of the story.

For a moment I wondered if I was listening to "Peter and the Wolf" - in a version for solo violin and set in Spain.

Actually it's a story about a bull (those bulls bred for fighting) who likes flowers and doesn't like sparring. Very soon, into the piece, the mere mention of "But not Ferdinand" and "Smell the flowers" - as well as that merry little tune, which is the idée fix for this aspect of the story - suffices to tickle our ribs. Maxim also impresses with Paganini-like playing - although no broken strings (Paganini would loosen the D, A and E strings so that they would break mid-performance and then he could heroically show off his skills by continuing to play unperturbed on the G-string) or upside-down playing (which people like Franz Clement did). He plays a stylish tango, coupled with a cry of "Ole!" halfway. There is also one part of the piece where he dances a little while fiddling simultaneously. After that performance, everybody is reluctant to let him go.

* * *

Some things from the programme:

Next year (2005)

8 Jan: Lee Huei Min plays Butterfly Lovers (oh no! Not again!)
15 & 16 April: Vladimir Feltsman plays Beethoven's Emperor Concerto (yes! Yes!)

SSO touring USA, France and Spain from 1 to 17 March

Shlomo Mintz and Hilary Hahn (Hahn-hahn) are returning in May!

. . .

Beethoven is not widely thought of as having a great sense of humour, but in 1825, he sent a spoof biography of one Tobias Haslinger, a fellow composer and close friend, to the publishers Schott. Unfortunately for Beethoven, Schott's published it!

Sigmund Steiner was Beethoven's first Vienna publisher. In all his dealings with Steiner, Beethoven used military terminology describing Steiner as the "Lieutenant-General", Haslinger (whose music Steiner also published) as the "Adjutant" and the money they received as the "Fighting Men". Beethoven reserved for himself the title "Generalissimo".

Although he never married, Beethoven was not immune to a young woman's charms. In May 1799 two sisters, Therese (24) and Josephine (20) von Brunsvik, went to Beethoven for piano lessons. He adored both of them to such an extent he allowed each lesson to overrun by as much as four hours.

Two years later, Beethoven was in love again, this time with one a cousin of the von Brunsvik sisters, Giulietta Guicciardi. She boasted that Beethoven would "promise me anything", but when he asked to marry her she turned tail and ran. It was for Guiulietta that Beethoven composed his famous "Moonlight" Sonata.

* * *

Oh no, where is Timothy Buzz-Bee? He wasn't on the programme today . . .

Well we saw Shane at the piano today during the Nanking piece.

And Jonathan Fox at the timpani for the first half of the concert.

1. Last person who wrote you a testimonial
Dawn

2. Sport you would least play
Basketball

3. Last movie you watched?
Anaconda: the Hunt for Blood Orchid

4. What do people first notice when they see you?
"Hey! You wear braces!!!"

5. Do you like peanut butter?
Yes

6. Most memorable place?
Library@Esplanade

7. Do you read comics?
Seldom

8. How pretty/handsome are you?
Very ugly

9. Do you like earthquakes?
Yes - the one whipped up by Swenson's.

10. Worst nightmare?
Meeting the old lady on the Jacob's Ladder at BMTC

11. Most beautiful place you've visited?
The Great Ocean Road in Victoria, Australia

12. Want to be a celebrity?
No

13. Do you like surveys?
Neutral about it

14. Your best physical asset?
My hands

15. Most people would describe me as?
Musically overdriven

16. Vegetables you hate?
Chilli padi

17. Do you like going out to buy groceries?
Neutral

18. Can you dance?
No

19. What's your past-time?
Composing, blogging, playing piano, listening to CDs (while blogging)

20. Are you happy?
NO of course . . . when are NSFs ever happy except during admin time, book-out days and ORD?

21. What is the time right now?
10:00am exactly

22. Aside from this survey, what are you doing at this time of the day?
Listening to the radio and trying to access the MIW website

23. First thing to do when you wake up tomorrow?
Brush my teeth and fill up my water bottle

24. Where are you right now?
At my desk in my room

25. What's your LSS? (Last Song Syndrome - the song that you're humming in your mind)
Under Attack by ABBA

1. What matters the most in a relationship?
Love, communication, trust, responsibility, commitment to one another

2. What makes you jealous?
When someone has something that I don't have, or cannot obtain or achieve

3. What makes you confused the most?
Juggling music work and soldiering

4. Are your friends always there for you?
Yes - or I could have died in NS

5. Do you have your own style?
Not yet - still searching and WILL eventually find it

6. Do you like copied?
Depends - if imitated for fun then I don't like it, but if copied in admiration then by all means

7. Do you have a simple life?
Yes

8. When was the longest time you used the phone and with who?
I can't remember, but usually it's with the people I'm very close with

9. Who are you talking to in MSN?
Nobody

10. Any sickness?
Unfortunately no . . . I want to see the MO and skive for a day or two!!! (What's the use of working hard in AETC when the big fucks are so stingy about rewards?)

11. Hate someone now?
The big fucks in AETC - fucking hell, screwed up our live-firing yesterday and subsequently prevented us from booking out on the same day . . .

12. Do you come online often?
Quite frequently

13. Who do you have in your family?
Parents and one younger brother

14. Wish you were at the ends of the ocean?
The ocean is boundless - how can there be ends?

15. Wish to go to the beach now?
No . . . I'm sick of the outdoors, I just want to enjoy urban life for a while

16. Are you sad now?
Yes . . . have to book-in tonight by 8:30pm

17. If you can have anything, what will it be?
ROD tomorrow . . . I don't want to serve this fucking army and this fucking unit anymore . . .

18. Do you have a pet?
No

19. What are you scared of?
Being told to "knock it down" and then tortured incessantly with maddening physical punishments

20. Are you open-minded?
Quite

21. Can you get along with all friends well?
Depends

22. Are you a listener or adviser?
Both

23. What song rocks now?
Those by ABBA!!!

24. What channel do you usually watch?
Arts Central (screw Kids Central for God's sake . . . it takes up so much air time that the arts programmes are pushed late into the night)

25. Go to the doctor's often?
I wish I can . . .

26. Do you think 49 rocks?
I guess so, because 7 is my favourite number, and 49 happens to be double 7!!!

27. Which day of the week do you like most?
Saturday

28. Which time of the day do you like most?
Night

29. How do you think of yourself?
See my profile in Friendster . . .

30. Do you talk to the wall?
Yes, if I lean against it. Then I will have to shout, "Help! Help! The wall is falling!" repeatedly.

Happy birthday to Philip, our beloved King of the Pipilanders!

* * *

Day seven (and eight, once passed 2359) of my former Parade Four. Some people are beginning to complain about the smell that is emitting . . .

* * *

I'm outfield today for the live-firing. My detail, being the last in the entire company, has been selected to help collect the ammunition, since we are only shooting on Monday. This means waking up at 3:30am in the morning.

It rains heavily. Boon How and I, in one of the two tonners going to the ammunition depot, forget to bring down the canvas flap at the front of the truck. The raindrops are blown into the passenger compartment as the driver sets his vehicle at a rather high speed. One side of my pants are wet; the other dry. Think Two-Face.

It's pretty exaggerating: two tonners and a whole lot of explosive warning signs just for a few crates of gun rounds.

Inclement weather delays the exercise. By the time the first group takes off for a dry-run, it is near lunch.

The beginnings of (by far the most fucked-up) exercise.

* * *

The largest wretch has to be OC Lieutenant Teo aka Doraemon. From comments by the Platoon Sergeants, he seldom takes their advices - which are time-and-tested anecdotes. Until Big Fuck Ong comes in and tells him EXACTLY the same thing that the Platoon Sergeants had told him earlier, and Doraemon has to waste time correcting his errors.

Also some other big fuck screws up our time by demanding that ALL sentries along the perimeter to the Live Firing Area be secured. This means placing people all the way to areas like the Tuas Second Link, which is like damn freaking far from where we are. We're not even dealing with explosives, but just rounds that even recruits at BMT have to face. Furthermore, for those exercises or live firings involving explosives, no such thing has been done before.

So the first group sets off to fire the live rounds at dinnertime.

PS John complains and bitches about throughout most of the later part of the afternoon. I think he has a valid reason for acting this way. Nobody- including himself - knows what exactly is going on at every one moment. As dinnertime approaches and he sees no group leaving to fire the live rounds, he becomes sceptical that a second group can go, and proceeds to remove the rounds from all the magazines. But Big Fuck Ong wants the second group to go as well; we will not stop until daylight has completely vanished. From this we derive that he has no bother for our book-out. These sign-on officers are only interested in their work; I wonder if they have a life outside. Even if they don't, for God's sake don't be selfish pigs and steal away our enjoyment of the civilian world. You are here on your own free will, because you chose to make the army your career, but we are merely Serve-And-Fuck-offs (SAF). While doing guard duty I've seen how these sign-on people return on a Sunday when there is nobody in the camp to work. How committed. I'd rather be staying and resting at home.

Back to the situation at the ammunition point: we have to put everything back again.

* * *

It is getting darker. Group 2 still has not yet returned. The others begin to dismantle everything and load the stores into the tonner to prepare for the return to camp. Everybody guesses that there is no possibility of booking out tonight. We have to declare ourselves free of ammunition and return our weapons to the armoury. Before all these, we have to return to the firing site to pick up the cartridges that have been dropped from the rifles during firing.

Bad news: a cartridge has been lodged into the machine gun situated on top of the tank, jamming the whole thing. The exercise has to be cut, and the men return with the exact number of rounds they'd been given, having not shot anything. PS John curses and swears as he has to remove all the rounds for the second time that day. The tank cannot be driven, in case the vibration causes the cartridge to shoot out. The armourer has to be called and driven to the site. We have to wait for the cartridge to return before we can get to the ammunition depot and return the rounds. I am instructed to sit inside the tonner and guard the ammunition that has been loaded onto it. I think I sit there for two - close to three - hours. I cannot sleep because I have to keep an eye on the precious cargo. Bored, I ask for an extra box of rations to munch on.

By the time we set off for the depot it is close to midnight. We spend ages there while the personnel count and weigh the rounds to determine the amount we return. We doze on and off several times.

Return to camp: 3am in the morning. Sleep: 4am, after shitting and bathing.

Sucks.

"Purple bruise
On my knee . . ."

I cannot prone down onto floor of the parade square anymore; my elbows and knees are bruised from leaping from an upright position into a lying position. It becomes increasingly difficult to get up from the floor again - my right hand becomes too weak to push my body up - to the extent that I have to twist my body to my side before I use my leg to prop myself up.

Shouting "Bang! Bang! Bang!" makes me loose my voice; besides that, we have to echo commands. It's very taxing upon my throat. Thanks to Sergeant Elson who buys Strepsils for us.

For now those purple spots on the parts of the body that make direct contact with the ground are the main areas of attraction and concern.

Day two of my former Parade Four.

* * *

This morning I've been dispatched to the road that leads to the main entrance of the camp to direct traffic.

The guards at the gate are performing vehicular checks, so there is a long snake down the road. There are reservists returning for their in-camp training; newly-posted privates; regulars and NSFs like me, all entering the camp. Not to forget the staff, who arrive on shuttle buses. My job - specific job - is to signal to the taxis to stop before a barrier some distance from the main gate. If they drop passengers as close to the main gate as possible, they will jam up the whole place.

I focus on the taxis. When I see one approaching, I signal for it to keep left and stop before the road barrier, behind which I'm standing. The other vehicles are none of my business.

Not until some irate driver winds down his window and calls me over.

"How can you let that car cut me? You're not even alert!" he demands angrily. Apparently a car had rounded the roundabout prior to the camp gate. This roundabout is behind where I stand, so I have no view of what is going on there.

I try to find an answer to appease him. "Well, Sir . . ." I stammer, "I've been instructed to direct the taxis-"

"Fuck you!" he spits angrily. "Private Lum," he continues, having glanced at my nametag, "you'd better be more alert!"

He winds up his window; I return to my post, feeling very bitter and angry. I don't even know how to direct traffic. Precisely due to my ignorance, I refuse to provide directions, because any misunderstandings may lead to an accident. But since he expects me to be a complete traffic controller, fine. I'll direct ALL the traffic. Don't blame any accidents on me. If one happens and I'm hauled up for questioning, I'll say that man told me to keep an eye on all aspects of the traffic.

The drivers are all mad. The shuttle buses cut through the lanes that are meant for traffic going in the other direction in order to reach the guardhouse at the quickest time possible and to avoid the pile-up. Motorcyclists weave between cars on a single lane. Taxi drivers try to cut the lane and U-turn immediately after they drop their passengers before the road barrier where I'm standing - there are many near-misses. To solve this problem, I end up conducting the vehicles - my right hand signals those on the left-most part of the road, while the left is meant for those on the inner lane of the road to follow. Most of the time I will stop the taxis and vehicles that drop-off their soldiers by the side of the road to let the vehicles of staff members travel through first.

Then there are parents whose kids have just been posted to become Armoured Infantry Troopers. They sport the usual field packs and - *gasp* - the new duffel bags, no more called "Ali Baba bags" but now (coined by me) "air-stewardess bags". Like me when I first came, they look lost, bewildered, anxious and scared. They look at me with koi-like mouths and stiffened eyes, like they're afraid I might eat them up. Perhaps it's due to my hardened (in reality, extremely bored) face. Anyway some parents are even more anxious than their kids that they ask if they can enter the camp to speak to the officer - "because my son has problems, so I'd like to inform the officer about his case . . ." Please do not ask me for permission to enter the camp; I'm merely a lowly private; please go the guard room to ask for a visitor's pass.

Ronald tells me similar stories of scared privates. He's stationed at the pedestrian gate beside the guardroom. He tells me that some of them actually QUIVER when asked for their 11B and mobile phone to be produced for inspection. We wonder why they behave like that . . . it's privates speaking to privates.

* * *

No guard rest for us, because we have to attend the lectures that are important towards our live firing this week. By right we're supposed to be allowed four hours or so of undisturbed rest to recuperate from the previous night's duties. Then again, company standing orders dictate that no one is allowed to sleep during office hours; it contradicts the principles of guard rest.

For the third time of my guard duty experience I am a sentry again.

This time the job involves standing in a cramped little guardroom between the two gates at the entrance to the camp for two hours. It's so freaking boring that I resort to helping the guard commander open and close the gates, and copy down the registration numbers of the vehicles that enter or leave the compound.

During rest periods, I sleep on one of the beds inside the guardhouse. From the outside, the room looks quite decent, but inside, like all other guardrooms, the mattresses are dirty and badly-stained. Think of seven different people sleeping on it throughout the whole week. By right, the guards serving the Sunday-Monday morning shift are supposed to change the bed sheets; by left nobody tells us to do anything. So I suspect I've been sleeping on a fortnight or month-old bed sheet. Anyway flies frequently come in and harass us, like what the mosquitoes do to us outfield. They land on your body and clothes and refuse to leave unless you swipe them off - pretty daring creatures. Anyway, one afternoon spent there is sufficient to drive me away from that room for subsequent rest periods - eventually I sleep in the TV room, on those leather couches that have gigantic armrests and backrests.

At night I'm called to do body checks on "selected" people. It's not my business, really. I just have the misfortune to be eating my night snack and enjoying a cool gulp of iced lemon tea when the guard commander calls me. I realise I'm the only personnel on rest who is still awake. I am made to sit at a table outside the guardhouse. Every time somebody declares to the guard commander that he does not have a mobile phone, he will be directed to my station, where I will search his things and his pockets to ensure that he has not been lying. I hate doing this. Not only is it my rest period, but also I feel it is an intrusion of other people's privacy, for the sake of security. I don't like it myself if I am told to spread eagle and then my body patted and searched. Besides I feel uncomfortable touching other people's bodies. I usually do a quick search before the feeling of discomfort increases to the extent that I will probably claw the wire fence and scream.

I survive the crucial 2-4am shift (the twilight zone - and also what I call the deep-sleep zone) by singing the whole of Les Miserables - the Tenth Anniversary Concert to myself.

* * *

Day one of my former Parade Four.

From Min Ru via Friendster:

1. Do you get jealous easily?
Sometimes . . . depends . . .

2. What have you been doing for the past few days?
Composing and arranging music (completed orchestration of Chopin's Etude Op. 10, No. 3; new accompaniment for my setting of "Sigh No More, Ladies"); writing blog; answering quizzes sent to me via Friendster; returning to TJC to visit and help the MEPers.

3. Last movies that you watched? With who?
Anaconda: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid with Wilfred, Ivan, Rachael, Jessica and her boyfriend

4. What are you going to do after this?
Finish listening to "Miss Saigon" for the second time in three days, then map out my ABBA medley for string ensemble (Proko says that woodwinds are too weak to carry out the string parts in the ABBA songs) - or perhaps for an orchestra where the TJC Chamber Ensemble combines with the Symphonic Band . . . ? Ha-ha, just dreams . . .

5. Have you cried before?
Of course . . . don't babies cry?

6. Serious in love before?
Love of music? YES! Music is serious business.

7. What is the first thing that comes to your mind?
So ambiguous . . .

8. Favourite song? Why?

9. What are you planning to do this weekend?
Try to write as much music as possible before I go back to camp on Sunday morning to do guard duty which I never asked for. (Fucking hell, why don't they get Ang Meng Wah to do it? Stupid chee bai . . . reported sick on Tuesday so that he didn't have to do guard duty . . . hate him more and more for it)

10. Do you club? Where?
Hate clubbing . . . after the experience at Angel's Reborn for Unit Anniversary

11. Do you smoke?
Passive smoker

12. Any people in love with you now?
How would I know?

13. Do you prefer SMS or talking on the phone?
SMS, because I only have a limited talk time - thereafter have to pay like mad

14. Are you missing someone now?
Lots of people . . . I'm frequently alone

15. What are you doing now?
Doing this survey, duh!

16. When is the last time you received flowers?
Last year, after performing in TJCO concert

17. Words to say about you?
See my Friendster profile . . .

18. Name your good friend
Lots of them!

19. Who do you want to kiss now?
Nobody

20. In love with anyone now? Who?
Nobody

21. Person who you wish to spend your life with?
My parents

22. If someone else likes you when you are attached?
Impossible situation, because I will never get attached

23. If someone likes your partner?
If the partner doesn't go around performing adultery then so be it

24. If your partner tells you off because of the other party?
Apologise

25. If your partner doesn't have time for you when you ask him or her out?
So be it . . . I'll stay at home and compose

26. If your partner always lie to you?
That's it, we're through!

From Aaron Choy via Friendster:

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GET A LONG ARMY WEEKEND

*YOU*

Name: August
Age: 19
Sex: Male
School: I'm not in school anymore . . . sad . . . no more student concessions . . .
Sign: Taurus
Location: Singapore

*CURRENTLY*

Current date: 010104
Current time: 1437
Clothes: Midnight blue short-sleeved shirt; cream-coloured Bossini trousers
Weather: Like-one-to-rain-and-don't-want-to-rain
Hairdo: Short
Footwear: Brown leather shoes
Talking to: Proko
Sounds: All the sounds that are associated with the TJC Music Studio 1

*HOW MANY*
Cups on the desk: Usually one - my drinking cup (and add that with one water bottle - these two items I'm always too lazy to return them back to the kitchen to wash)
Pets: None
Sibling: 1 younger brother
Crushes: None
Cousins: Three (from my father's side)
Aunts: 2
Uncles: 4

*HOW MANY TIMES PER DAY DO YOU*
Change clothes: Standard about three times: from admin to PT kit when I wake up in the morning; PT kit to Long 4/Smart 4; if Smart 4 I may roll down to Long 4; end of the day, Long 4 to admin again
Shower: Once a day
Brush your teeth: Once a day - sometimes twice, depending how tired I am or how much admin time I have in the evening
Wash your face: Twice - countless times when there are lectures
Say the word ok: Countless . . .
Yell at your siblings: Once or twice nowadays . . .
Slam doors: Never

*HABITS / HAVE YOU"

Nail-biting: Yes
Procrastination: Yes
Stress: Yes
Taking out issues on others: Seldom
Self-injury (e.g. cutting yourself, burning yourself, pulling your hair etc): Tried to . . . chao keng, you know?
Tendency to judge people: Sometimes
Putting living things in your mouth: No way!

*FOR A MILLION BUCKS, WOULD YOU . . .*

The answer to the following questions are NO. I'm not materialistic and I won't do stupid things for money. Earning money is through hard work and effort, you'll also feel better spending the money.

Name your kid "Dammit"?
Shave your head?
Wax off your eyebrow?
Wax an old man's back?
Sit in a cage with four hungry wolves?
Eat a snake?
Swim with jellyfish?
Stand up in class and flip your teacher the finger?

*ALMOST OVER*
Why did you take this survey?
What's the time now? 1912
What are you doing after this? Continue to compose

[NOW]

Happy or sad
Mixed feelings

Sleepy or awake
Quite awake (because I just drank teh-o)

Hungry or full
Full . . . took my dinner just less than 3 hours ago

Dirty or clean
I'm supposed to be taking my bath now, but I'm procrastinating

Single or taken
Single

Alone or with someone beside you
Alone. Everybody else is in the living room watching TV

Sick or healthy
Only the leg is sick: I've got a muscle strain in my calf

[WHAT]

You last ate
KFC

You last drank
Teh-o

You are wearing now
Underwear, midnight blue multi-pocket trousers

Are you thinking of
How to write my ABBA medley

Are you wishing for?
ORD is just tomorrow

Do you overuse?
Electricity - it's used for my laptop, piano (heater), cell phone, speakers, lighting, fans . . .

Do you take for granted?
Civilian life . . . it's almost impossible to return to the world of freedom as I like it

[WHO]

Do you miss the most?
Pipilanders and the MEPers

Do you love?
My family, my laptop, my piano, my Nokia 3310 (still with me for two years and carrying on)

Do you feel most happy with?
The people I'm very good with

Makes you laugh like a maniac
Anybody who can make me laugh like a maniac

Makes you sleep
Lousy army specialists would don't know how to teach and bore me

Makes you cry
A beautiful piece of music

Makes you angry
Some people . . . I don't want to mention them here

Enlightens you
Mr Philip Tan

Ill-treats you
Nobody

[WHEN]

Is your birthday
20 May

Is your wedding anniversary
None of it

Is the happiest day of your life?
The day when Xin Chao took to the stage of the VCH . . . but I wasn't there to listen

Is the saddest day of your life?
Not being able to book out

Did you last swear?
Yesterday

Did you last have a fight?
No

Did you last cry?
Yes, about two weeks ago

[HOW]

Do you break off with someone?
Don't maintain any contact with the person, if the relationship is that bad the other party will probably not bother to call you at all.

Do you overcome depression?
Occupy yourself with an activity that will make you busy so that you will have no opportunity to think about the unhappy thing

Do you live your life?
By making and creating music

Do you make friends?
Gain their trust and appreciation; when they know you're a good person, they will naturally warm and open up themselves towards you

Do you pass your time?
Composing, writing my blog(s), thrashing out on the piano

Do you pass your exams?
Studying smart, and studying with someone else, which takes the boredom away, while at the same time motivating oneself

Do you find yourself?
See my profile on Friendster

[WHY]

Do you normally get angry?
By nature I'm a person that is psychologically volatile and therefore easily pissed off

Are you doing this survey?
Because I think I am feeling crapped

DO YOU?

Taken from Yushan's blog:

1. Do You Know How To Iron?
Extremely amateurish ironing - basically I only iron the parts of the clothes that can lie flat onto the ironing board.

2. Do You Know How To Cook?
I know how to cook noodles - instant noodles in a cup.
I know how to prepare kaya toast: place the bread inside the microwave oven, toast it, and then spread kaya over it.
Easy, eh?

3. Do You Make Your Own Bed?
Of course I have to . . . the bunk must be in stand-by conditions at all times.

4. Do You Mop Or Sweep The Floor?
Sweep the floor . . . mostly the toilet floor, because I'm a toilet cleaner.

5. Do You Know How To Wash Clothes?
Amateurish washing of clothes . . . usually I let the washing machine do the job for me when I book-out.

6. Do You Have A Maid?
Nope.

7. Do You Help Wash The Dishes?
Everybody washes his or her own dishes at home

8. Do You Wash The Toilet?
Ha-ha, my daily profession! I'm one of the three toilet cleaners in my platoon!

9. Do You Go To The Wet Market?
Nope.

10. Do You Litter Your Room, Then Not Clean It Up?
Nope, because my father will screw me upside down

11. How Do You Wake Up In The Morning?
Either (1) the Bunk I/C or Platoon I/C claps twice loudly, or (2) wake up at 4:30am, look at the watch, say, "Shit! Half an hour more" get back to bed, laze around a bit and then get up for good, or (3) automatically sit up on the bed, look at the time and then realize that it's time to get moving.

From Min Ru via Friendster?

100-QUESTIONS QUIZ

1. First name? August
2. Middle name? None
3. Last name? Lum
4. Nicknames? Ba Yue; Orgy; Augy/Auggie; Shostakovich/Shos; Ah Gong/Grandpa; Aug; Auger; Ah-Goose; Forrest Gump; Mr Bean; Emperor; September, October, July and all that shit; Gus - come on, be creative and give me more nicknames
5. Gender? Male
6. Age? 19
7. Birthday? 20 May
8. Height? 171cm
9. Hair colour? Black
10. Eye colour? Dark brown - to the extent of walnut
11. Race? Chinese
12. Do you wear glasses or contacts? Glasses
13. Do you have braces? Yes
14. Is your hair long or short? Short
15. Where were you born? Singapore
16. Current location? At home
17. Zodiac sign? Taurus
18. Chinese horoscope? Ox
19. Nationality? Singaporean
20. Bad habits? a lot . . . too embarrassing to mention . . .
21. Piercings that you have? None
22. Piercings that you want? No way!
23. Tattoos that you have? None
24. Tattoos that you want? No way!
25. Today's date? 26 September 2004
26. The time? 1723
27. Who sent you this survey? Min Ru
28. Who do you think will re-post? I don't know
29. Do you have a pet? Nope
30. When's your first date? Somewhere in the far future
31. Who was your first date? Still trying to find out . . . in the far future
32. Do you think you're cool? No
33. Ready for more questions? Yes
34. Hungry or full? Full
35. Do you blog? Yes
36. Do you chat? Very seldom now
37. Action/horror/comedy movie? Comedy . . . can't stand those ghost shows
38. Hotdog/burger/sandwich? No preference
39. Coke/Pepsi? No preference
40. How many languages do you know? Two
41. Siblings? One younger brother, in Primary 5
42. Shoe size? US 11
43. Are you still in school? No
44. Did you drop out? No, I graduated
45. What is your current GPA, or last GPA? What the heck is that?
46. Favourite grade? JC2 - because I had the Pipilanders and the MEPers
47. Current grade? Hanging at A-level-qualified
48. Favourite teacher? Lots of them! Those who enlightened me and nurtured my naïve thoughts . . .
49. Least favourite teacher? None
50. Favourite subjects? Music, History, English Literature!
51. Do you buy lunch or bring it? Catered by Singapore Food Industries
52. Do you play any sports on the school's team? No
53. Do you do any extracurricular activities? CO (when I was still schooling)
54. Your favourite dance? Contemporary Ballet
55. Your least favourite dance? I don't know
56. Your favourite memory? Performing at Mardi Gras 2004 and getting to meet up with the Pipilanders
57. Your least favourite memory? At the same Mardi Gras listening to the Combo Band play my arrangements and thereafter realising that they never credited me on stage for doing the work
58. More humiliating moment? While conducting at the Teacher's Day Dinner in 2001, my makeshift baton (actually a balloon stick) broke two times within seconds of starting the first piece
59. Number(s)? 7, 27
60. Clothing brand? Giordano
61. Shoes? New Balance, ha-ha
62. Saying(s)? "Good music resembles something. It resembles the composer"
63. TV Show(s)? Those programmes on High Notes on Arts Central
64. Sport(s)? Long-distance cycling
65. Vegetables? Raw tomatoes, raw lettuce, bean sprouts
66. Fruit? Orange, Ya Pear, Mandarin Orange, Plum, Peach, Durian!!!
67. Magazine? BBC Music Magazine
68. Actor? Kenneth Branagh
69. Actress? Nicole Kidman
70. Candy? Mentos and Kopiko
71. Gum? Those gum shaped like bears
72. Scent? New car smell
73. Chocolate bar? Mars Bar / Snickers
74. Ice cream flavour? Chocolate
75. Colour? Black
76. Seasons? Autumn
77. Holidays? (in the past) June and December
78. Band? ABBA
79. Singer? Lea Salonga
80. Group? The creative team of Alain Boubil and Claude-Michel Schonberg
81. Rappers? Black-Eyed Peas, Eminem (these are the rappers whose lyrics have meaningful significance)
82. Types of music? The kind of music that encompasses the days from Baroque to Modern 20th Century whose current, popular term I deplore to use; Musicals!!!
83. Things in you room? Compaq Evo N800V
84. Place to be? Library@Esplanade
85. Radio station? 90.5FM, 92.4FM
86. TV Channel? Arts Central
87. Junk food? Prawn Cracker, Tapioca Chips
88. Overall food? I eat almost anything and everything! (Except cheese and the too-hot-for-me-to-handle chilli)
89. Mall? IKEA!
90. Fast food? Burger King
91. Restaurant? Ellenborough Market Restaurant at the Merchant Court Hotel; Red Star Restaurant
92. Shape? Circle
93. Person you have a crush on? Go and find out!
94. Coolest person you know? Leonard Bernstein!!!
95. Favourite song? "I Dreamed a Dream" from Les Miserables
96. Favourite singer? Kellie Rode ("Sophie" in Mamma Mia!)

From Min Ru via Friendster:

QUESTION!!!

1. At what age was your first true love?
Never had a first true love before?

2. Do the both of you get together?
N.A

3. What do you think is love?
A true passion and enthusiasm for the person/thing that makes you want to commit yourself to him/her/it no matter what circumstances

4. Have you ever cried so hard that your eyes almost popped out?
In primary school

5. When was the longest time you missed or loved someone?
Never before

6. Are you a gay?
NO!!!

7. What would you do if someone really loves you a lot?
Accept her love

8. Ever felt very disappointed in yourself?
Yes, many times

9. Things you regretted?
Not pulling strings for MDC in the first place, or even finding faults with my body before my pre-enlistment medical check-up so that I may get Pes C

10. Can your guy or girl talk openly with you about anything?
Certain subjects

11. Have you fell for a person online?
No, and I will never

12. Have you liked someone of the same sex?
NO.

13. Have you almost died?
Yes . . . nearly killed by my section mate Tan Boon How inside the tank

14. Have you ever had a dream which you see yourself falling?
Yes . . . quite a few times

15. Have you a diary?
Online diary . . . i.e. it's called a BLOG (actually I have 5 blogs under my name)

16. Have your own room?
Yes

17. Have you felt useless and hopeless?
Lots of times

18. Ever cried yourself to sleep?
No

19. Have you hated someone so much?
Not just someone . . . quite a number of people

20. Have you really waited for the person you love till they break with their stead?
No . . . stupid waste of time and resources

21. Have you seen your loved ones being bullied?
Yes

22. Have you not dared to sleep?
Yes

23. Have you got no more money left for the week?
Sometimes

24. Have you failed your exams so badly?
Of course . . . I got a 1/25 for my first year JCT Gothic paper . . . how bad do you think that is?

25. What's your wish now?
To ORD tomorrow

26. Ever wished on a falling star?
Never seen a falling star before . . .

27. Have you ever wanted to die?
Yes

28. Stress in studies?
That was in the past . . .

29. Have you gone crazy?
Many times . . . crazy with grief or crazy with happiness or crazy with depression

30. Have you felt very lonely?
Seldom . . . I like being alone

31. Have you felt you just needed some space for youself?
A lot of times

32. Have you felt that nobody loves you?
Lots of times

33. Have you ever seen porn?
NO WAY!!!

34. Have you known that your parents love you a lot so they nagged?
Most of the time I misunderstand that

35. Have you kissed or hugged a friend?
Hugged

36. What is the meaning for life?
Being happy and contented, and having those you love around you.

37. How many people have you fell for before?
One

38. Do you have your own computer?
Yes

39. Have you been bullied?
Many times

40. Have you raped a person?
NO WAY!!!

41. Do you like yourself?
Not really

42. Do you feel like eating a cow?
No . . . I feel like puking

43. Do you think black rocks?
The colour black? Why, OF COURSE!!!

44. What is the number that you like most between 1 to 99?
7

45. Do you agree in underage sex?
NO!!!

46. Do you have a gang?
Pipiland!!!

47. What are you thinking now?
How I have been wronged into doing guard duty on Sunday instead of somebody else